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Wednesday, May 14, 2025
Good morning to you!

My wife and I both enjoy working on the yard. I tend to the grass, and Jolene beautifies the yard with flowers and plants. I am not much help in picking out the pretty stuff, but I am good at watering. It’s a simple task for a simple guy. Turn hose on. Drench everything. Turn hose off. Repeat daily. My only frustration with the watering task is the garden hose. With all the technology in the world today, there has to be a better option.

It doesn’t seem to matter how much money I spend on a hose, as it eventually gets a kink. I realize this — after I have extended the hose 50 feet or so — when the water refuses to come out. So, I shake the hose up and down repeatedly, trying to work out that kink from afar. After multiple failed attempts and creating another kink or two, I throw the hose down in frustration and hastily follow the line until I find the kinks. I carefully straighten out the hose and then watch the nozzle end take off like a kangaroo on fire. I chase the hose down, but not until I am soaked head to toe. It keeps the neighbors entertained.

The hose headaches are not just in the yard. Inevitably, when washing my truck, the hose will get stuck on a tire. Despite my best pulling and whipping efforts, it won’t budge. Rubber on rubber just doesn’t seem to have any give.

My mother-in-law had one of those coiled hoses that were advertised as the solution a few years back. It worked great… for one season. Then it looked like the Slinky my brother and I played tug-of-war with as kids.

Of course, the hose is just half of the problem. Nozzles give me fits, too. I seem to have about a dozen of them around the garage, as I pick up a new one at the hardware store each season. The problem is, I don’t throw away the ones that leak, and then I can’t remember which ones leak and which ones don’t. It’s silly, I know, especially after my shoes get soaked with each nozzle change.

Several years back, my friend Darren gave me a fireman’s nozzle with all-metal fittings and a massive pull-back handle to let the water fly. It is the size of a toaster, but it is truly amazing. But, after a dozen years or so, it leaks, too. And, yes, I still keep it.

Back in 2017, I was mesmerized by an ad I saw from Home Depot for a Bluetooth cordless hose. Some guy who looked like Brett Favre was spraying his shrubs with a nozzle with no hose. Yes, I fell for it momentarily.

Meanwhile, I continue wrestling with the garden hose each day. For the most part, I know what to expect. Unfortunately, so does the hose.

Have a wonderful Wednesday, and thanks for reading.

Shane Goodman 

President and Publisher
Big Green Umbrella Media
shane@dmcityview.com
515-953-4822, ext. 305
www.thedailyumbrella.com

See more of Shane Goodman's columns here.

 
 
News headlines

FROM KCCI: New restrictions for pipelines in bill that passed through Iowa Statehouse late Monday. Iowa lawmakers have approved a bill (HF 639) that could impose new restrictions on pipeline companies seeking to use eminent domain for their projects, with the Summit Carbon Solutions pipeline at the center of the debate. The legislation now awaits Gov. Kim Reynolds' signature.  ... READ MORE

FROM WHO-TV: Iowa’s first Latina legislator sworn in to office. History was made at the Iowa State Capitol Tuesday morning. New State Representative Angel Ramirez (D-Cedar Rapids) was sworn in. She is the first Latina to be elected to the Iowa State Legislature. ... READ MORE

FROM WOI: Fireworks would be allowed in all cities for July 4 under advancing House bill. If signed into law, cities and counties will be prohibited from banning or limiting the use of fireworks on July 3rd and 4th, and on New Year's Eve. ... READ MORE

 

Clear Mortgage meteorology

A hotter Wednesday ahead. Rain chances in the north Thursday, then cooling. Next rain chance comes late Sunday into Monday.

For help with pre-approvals or refinancing, get in touch with Originating Branch Manager Carrie Hansen at carrie.mortgage.

 
Pollen tracker
 
Tree pollen: Very high
Grass pollen: High
Ragweed pollen: None
 
The 2025 results: CITYVIEW's Best of Des Moines®
 

Best Local Antique Store

1. Brass Armadillo Antique Mall

2. The Picker Knows

3. Raccoon Forks Trading Company

 
See all of the results
 
 

Woebegone Wednesday
 
Heavy drinking: It’s not just for lonely people anymore. 24/7 Wall Street released a survey that found Iowa ranked second only to perpetual champion Wisconsin in cities with drinking problems. The Badgers had twice as many (12) top 100 heavy drinking towns. Iowa had six with Dubuque leading the pack ahead of Iowa City, Cedar Rapids, Cedar Falls/Waterloo, Des Moines and Ames. Those are all in heavily populated eastern and central Iowa. That gives the lie to the long standing belief that heavy drinking is a product of desolation. Sioux City and Harlan in western Iowa had some bars that refused to enforce Prohibition. Does this mean that heavy drinking is out of the closet?
  
Deals today
• Wednesdays bring steak night to Club 2000 (422 Indianola Road, Des Moines). Steaks are cooked to order with salad, potato and bread, $14.99.

• Angry Goldfish (2301 S.W. Ninth St., Des Moines) offers hot beef sandwiches with mashed potatoes and gravy for $11.50 on Wednesday. 

• Curbin' Cuisine (1325 SW Oralabor Road, Ankeny) offers traditional gyros for $7 Wednesdays. 

• Wine bottles are half price on Wednesdays at Trostel's Greenbriar (5910 Merle Hay Road, Johnston). The Continental, (407 East Fifth St., Des Moines) also has half-priced bottles on Wednesdays. 

• Barntown's (9500 S.E. University Ave., West Des Moines) Wednesday specials are a pound of chicken tenders with fries and two sauces for $11.99, plus $13 core pitchers of beer.

• Wednesday is Biryani Festival at Chowrastha (5910 Ashworth Road, West Des Moines). Buy two and a third is free.

• Village Inns offer free pie with entrees on Wednesdays. 

• Kids eat free with every paying adult on Wednesdays at Chuck’s (3610 Sixth Ave., Des Moines).

• It's lasagna day at Maxie's Supper Club (1311 Grand Ave., West Des Moines), breaded pork tenderloin day at Eastside Eddie's (3517 E. 26th St.), and barbecue ribs evening at G Migg's (128 Fifth St., Valley Junction).

• Panka Peruvian (2708 Ingersoll Ave., Des Moines) has live jazz Wednesday. 

• Curbin Cuisine (1325 SW Oralabor, Ankeny) has $7 gyros on Wednesdays. 

• Bordanaro's (6108 S.W. Ninth St., Des Moines) has a Wednesday-Thursday only special on carryout pizza. They start at $6.50 for a 10-inch cheese pie. Each ingredient added is an extra charge, but this pretty much adds up to half-price pies.

• Gilroy's (1238 Eighth St., West Des Moines) has fried chicken specials tonight.  

• Kwik Stars' special of eight pieces of fried chicken for $10 is daily now through the first week of June. Their fried chicken is ridiculously good for a convenience store.  

• On Wednesdays you can get any burger, wrap or sandwich with fries for $9.99 at Tito's Lounge (3916 N.W. Urbandale Dr, Urbandale). 

• Jake Schrodt plays Stuffed Olive at 6 tonight and Andy Classen / Jack Curtis Duo is at Louie’s Wine Dive at the same time.  

• Jethro's have $9.99 BPT sandwiches, including  side of choice, on Wednesdays. 

• Price Choppers have sales on iceberg lettuce at $1.69 each, frozen Swai fillets at $3.49/pound and chicken hindquarters for $6.99/10-pound bag, through Monday.

• Fresh Thyme (2900 University Ave., West Des Moines) begins week-long sales today on sockeye salmon fillets at $9.99/pound, 3-pound bags of mandarins or navel oranges for $2.99. and asparagus for 99 cents/pound with coupon.  
 
— Jim Duncan, jd91446@aol.com

 
 
Featured in the current issue of CITYVIEW
 

FILM REVIEW
The strange and alluring magic of ‘A Minecraft Movie’

By David Rowley

“A Minecraft Movie”
PG | 101 minutes
Director: Jared Hess
Writers: Chris Bowman, Hubbel Palmer, Neil Widener
Stars: Jack Black, Jason Momoa, Emma Myers
Well, let’s just get this out of the way. If you’re reading this, this movie probably isn’t for you. No disrespect, of course. I mean it in the sense that you have likely aged out of having spontaneous lava-chicken singalongs in a packed theater.

So, about the plot. It is flimsier than a dirt block ceiling over a lava lake. A handful of characters get sucked into the Minecraft universe and are told they need to find a MacGuffin to get back home. They were not living amazing lives or anything, but getting trapped in a pixelated hellscape seemed like a step up. Garrett (Jason Mamoa) is a washed-up gamer with massive debt; sibling Henry (Eugene Hanson) and Natalie (Emma Myers) are supporting each other after their mother’s death; Dawn (Danielle Brooks) sells realty in a (seemingly) dying town and has a mobile zoo on the side; and Steve (Jack Black) goes from a stable job in the real world to “guess I’m a miner now, bye world.” ...

 
Read more
 
Featured home for sale
 
Post listings here for $50. Contact jolene@iowalivingmagazines.com for details.
 
$1,219,900

11528 N.W. Brookefield Court
Grimes, IA 50111

Presenting the stunning new 1.5 story Willow plan by Kimberley Development, situated on a 1.2-acre lot in the exclusive BrookeField Estates development. Offering 6 bedrooms with the primary suite tucked away on the main level, 2 upstairs, and 3 in the daylight lower level. The details speak for themselves with a unique open stairway, an arched entry into the great room, and extensive trimwork throughout. ...

 
See the listing here.
 
See more homes for sale
 
SOLD: Featured commercial real estate transaction
 
4100 GRAND AVE., DES MOINES
SALE DATE: 2025-01-02
SALE PRICE: $775,000
SELLER: METRO RENTALS LLC-4100 GRAND
BUYER: STANBROUGH RESIDENTIAL LLC
ACRES: 0.645
SQUARE FEET: 9,036
 
More transactions
 
Featured in the current
issue of Johnston Living magazine
 

From high school to headliners
Johnston grads form band, “The Squares.”

By Lindsey Giardino

Frederick “Fred” Jensen (Johnston High School class of 2023) didn’t plan to start a band when he got to college, but that’s exactly what happened. Today, he’s the drummer for The Squares, a group of six, four of whom are Johnston High School graduates.

The band, which also includes Jackson Zimmerman (class of 2024), Cameron Capalbo (2023), Jake Gragg (2024), Sasha Wemmie and Charlie Richards, has been performing regularly in Iowa City while they attend the University of Iowa. But, later this spring, they’ll return to Johnston for a hometown show.

“The Squares” will perform at the Johnston Town Center for Tunes at Twilight on Thursday, May 29 at 7:30 p.m.

 
Read more
 
Sports headlines
FROM SPORTS ILLUSTRATED: Rob Manfred’s Pete Rose Flip-Flop Further Stains His Legacy. Manfred has spent his decade as MLB commissioner publicly talking about the integrity of baseball and privately taking swipes at it. ... READ MORE
 
FROM ESPN.COM: Thunder rally late for Game 5 win, 3-2 series lead vs. Nuggets. For three quarters, the Denver Nuggets were controlling Game 5 of this slugfest of a second-round playoff series against the Oklahoma City Thunder. Nikola Jokic was hitting everything, even the kind of off-balance, one-footed fling of a 3-pointer that only he can. The young Thunder looked, well, young. ... READ MORE
 
FROM YAHOO SPORTS: Celtics star Jayson Tatum ruled out for rest of postseason after suffering torn Achilles in loss to Knicks. Jayson Tatum’s postseason is over. The Boston Celtics star was ruled out for the rest of the playoffs with a torn right Achilles tendon, the team announced. Tatum underwent surgery Tuesday, less than 24 hours after he initially sustained the injury. A timeline for his return is not yet known, but he is expected to make a full recovery. ... READ MORE
 
 

1607: Jamestown settlers arrive. On May 14, 1607, some 100 English colonists arrive along the east bank of the James River in Virginia to found Jamestown, the first permanent English settlement in North America. Dispatched from England by the London Company, the colonists had sailed across the Atlantic aboard the Susan Constant, Godspeed and Discovery. ... READ MORE

1804: Lewis and Clark depart to explore the Northwest. May 14, 1804: One year after the United States doubled its territory with the Louisiana Purchase, the Lewis and Clark expedition leaves St. Louis, Missouri, on a mission to explore the Northwest from the Mississippi River to the Pacific Ocean. ... READ MORE

1973: America’s first space station, Skylab, is launched. Skylab, America’s first space station, is successfully launched into an orbit around the earth. Eleven days later, U.S. astronauts Charles Conrad, Joseph Kerwin, and Paul Weitz made a rendezvous with Skylab, repairing a jammed solar panel and conducting scientific experiments during their 28-day stay aboard the space station. ... READ MORE

 www.history.com

 
Birthdays and notables
 

These celebrities were born on this date: Miranda Cosgrove, Mark Zuckerberg, Jack Hughes, Rob Gronkowski, Olly Murs, Cate Blanchett, George Lucas, Sofia Coppola, Zach Edey, Dustin Lynch

SUBMIT: Send your local birthday greetings and congratulatory notes to: tammy@iowalivingmagazines.com

 
Morning chuckle

The answer to the last riddle: What do clowns fill their cars with? LAUGHING GAS! - Gail Tomlinson. Thanks to Irving Stone and William Snyder for sending answers, too!

Today's riddle: Why was the woman thrown out of the park for arranging squirrels by height?

Have a guess? Email tammy@iowalivingmagazines.com

 

To advertise in the Daily Umbrella or CITYVIEW, contact:

Mary Fowler
Account Executive
515-953-4822 x311
c: 641-485-0555
mary@dmcityview.com

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8101 Birchwood Ct Suite D
Johnston, Iowa 50131

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