My friend Mark is a bit of a wisecracker. You likely have a friend like Mark. Or maybe you are a Mark.
Mark married his high school sweetheart, and I attended their wedding. I was young and single and not one to shop for wedding presents. So, I did what every other single guy my age would have done — I put cash in a card.
When Mark sent his thank you to me, here is what he wrote: “Thank you for the toaster. One can never have too much toast.”
As I said, wisecracker. Although, admittedly, I did laugh out loud while reading it.
I thought of Mark the other day when I made a slice of toast. And I thought of my now-deceased mother. Mom really did like toast. So much so, in fact, that she is only person I know who wore out a toaster. Seriously. Who does that?
It was even a newer-model toaster. The original toaster we had in my childhood was as heavy as a tank and had one of those cloth-braided electrical cords, slightly frayed. That one should have died, but it is likely still burning toast somewhere. The one Mom bought as a replacement didn’t last a fraction of the time and literally burned up.
So, I took Mom toaster shopping. She picked out a four-slice toaster that was the size of my first car. I asked, “Are you sure you want that big of a toaster, Mom? Are you really going to eat that much toast?” The 80-year-old woman replied, “Yes, do you have a problem with that?”
As you may have guessed, I bought a four-slice toaster for my mom that day. When she died and my siblings and I were sorting through her things, my brother asked me why in the world a single woman would have a toaster that size. I explained, and he took both arms and handed it to me. Now, I have a four-slice toaster for the one slice I make. On the plus side, it warms up the kitchen, too.
Now that I think of it, my friend Mark’s wedding anniversary has to be coming up soon, and what better gift is there than a four-slice toaster? One can never have too much toast.
Now, who is the wisecracker?
Have a thoughtful Thursday, and thanks for reading.
Shane Goodman
