When I ask a yes/no question, I expect a yes/no answer. Some people are good at answering these types of questions. For others, though, it seems to be an impossible task. Ever wonder why that is? I do, and I continue to research the subject because I am intrigued by how some choose to answer (or, more accurately, not answer).

In my readings, I found the thoughts of former FBI agent Jack Schafer to be fascinating. He is the author of “The Like Switch” and says people who choose not to answer directly to a yes/no question are quite often simply being deceptive. He offers three techniques to detect their lies.

The first technique is something he calls “The Land Of Is,” which is derived from President Clinton's statement, "It depends upon what the meaning of the word 'is' is.” Schafer says The Land Of Is occupies “the space between truth and deception” and consists of “half-truths, innuendos, suppositions, assumptions and verbal judo.” Schafer states if a person fails to answer yes or no, a red flag should pop up. When that happens, he says to ask the same question again. If the person fails to answer with a yes or no again, he says the probability of deception increases significantly. I use this technique frequently, and I have found that most people do answer when asked the second time. I also sometimes preface the question with, “This is a yes/no question” to avoid the 10 minutes of babble.

Schafer’s second technique to deal with people who don’t answer yes/no questions is to learn to identify when they begin their answer with, “Well…” He says this indicates that the person is about to give an answer that he or she feels the questioner is not expecting and the person asking the question should be aware that lies are coming.

The third technique Schafer recommends when someone doesn’t answer directly is to ask some variation of, “Why should I believe you?” He says truthful people answer with, "Because I'm telling the truth.” He says liars have a difficult time answering with those words because they are not telling the truth. Instead, they offer responses such as "I'm an honest person," or "You don't have to believe me if you don't want to" or "I have no reason to lie." Of course, the framing of this question is important to avoid offending and may be more appropriate for an FBI agent than a boss, friend, spouse or parent.

Schafer notes that these methods to deal with ambiguous people do not detect deception all the time, but they do provide an indicator to determine if someone is being truthful or not and should warn you to examine the answers in greater detail. Of course, not all yes/no questions have cut and dried answers, but many do.

What do you think? How do you deal with people who struggle to answer yes/no questions? Shoot me a note and let me know.

Have a wonderful Wednesday, and thanks for reading.

Shane Goodman
President and Publisher
Big Green Umbrella Media
shane@dmcityview.com
515-953-4822, ext. 305
www.thedailyumbrella.com

See Shane Goodman's previous columns here.

POLITICAL MERCURY
What Tom Harkin would do if he were running for political office in 2024

By Douglas Burns

Tom Harkin still has it. The pulse of Iowa on instinct auto dial and a force of moral clarity and that defining doggedness, an aw-shucks ease with voters, and a rhetorical sledgehammer ever ready when he needs it. He’s fast, too, on the draw with a prescription for Democrats in Iowa in 2024.

It’s discipline of message, the former Democratic senator told me in an interview recently in Council Bluffs.

These celebrities were born on this date: Ashton Kutcher, Chris Rock, Essence Atkins, Garth Brooks, James Spader, Eddie Izzard, David Bryan, Deborah Ann Woll, Isaiah Thomas, Steven Stamkos, Tina Majorino, Tom Blankenship

SUBMIT: Send your birthday greetings and congratulatory notes to: tammy@iowalivingmagazines.com

The answer to yesterday's riddle:

What do you call a psychic gnome who escaped from prison? A SMALL MEDIUM AT LARGE! - Kris Laurson, Rex Post, Gail Tomlinson. Also answering: William Snyder

Today's riddle

What happened when the pirate with one leg had to walk the plank?

Have a guess? Email tammy@iowalivingmagazines.com

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