Where exactly is the Midwest, and what makes someone a Midwesterner? I thought I had this all figured out until I read an intriguing piece in the Wall Street Journal this week. The article was written about the surprising number of things that Americans get wrong about the Midwest. The story is hidden behind one of those annoying paywalls, so you have to fork over some money if you want to read the entire article. It basically points out how a large number of residents in Wyoming, Montana and even Arkansas consider themselves to be living in the Midwest. I really don’t care. The more, the merrier, in my world. But the notion of being a Midwesterner when you are really not one doesn’t seem to sit well with other folks from those outlying states. They don’t know what they are missing.

Let’s start with where the Midwest officially is. The U.S. Census Bureau says it includes Illinois, Indiana, Iowa, Kansas, Michigan, Minnesota, Missouri, Nebraska, North Dakota, Ohio, South Dakota and Wisconsin. Most all of us living in these states would likely agree to this definition.

If it were only that easy. The Midwest is apparently one of four U.S. census regions with the others being West, Northeast and South. Inside those four regions are several divisions, which include Pacific, Mountain, West North Central, East North Central, West South Central, East South Central, New England, Middle Atlantic, South Atlantic and East South Central. We Iowans are in the West North Central.

These designations are as clear as mud — or at least as clear as comedian Steve Martin’s routine on smoking marijuana: “I would only smoke it in the late evening. Oh, occasionally the early evening, but usually the late evening — or the mid-evening. Just the early evening, midevening and late evening. Occasionally, early afternoon, early midafternoon, or perhaps the late-midafternoon. Oh, sometimes the early-mid-late-early morning… but never at dusk.”

A more important question than where the Midwest is may be what makes someone a Midwesterner. The website inspiredbyinsiders.com offers “25 Signs That You Are a True Native of the Midwest.” Some of this reads like it was written by a person who is not a Midwesterner, but I do agree with a few: We know the importance of a good Jell-O salad. We have a strong connection to our hometowns. We know how to make a good s’more. We have experienced the magic of county fairs. We can handle extreme weather conditions. And we value humility and hard work.

Damn right. But there is one more that should be added: If it makes people feel better, we are also OK with them calling themselves Midwesterners — even if they are not.

Have a terrific Tuesday, and thanks for reading.

Shane Goodman 

President and Publisher
Big Green Umbrella Media
shane@dmcityview.com
515-953-4822, ext. 305
www.thedailyumbrella.com

See Shane Goodman's previous columns here.

On this episode, Tammy and Cyote talk about more CITYVIEW stories from the January edition and Iowa Living Magazine features from Urbandale, Grimes/Dallas Center, North Polk, Ankeny and Discover Dallas County.

The business of snow removal
By Colson Thayer

Oliver Barragan, Eric Vargas and Zach Frye with Vargas Lawn Care Services are prepared for the unpredictable Iowa winter.

When local meteorologists announce snow is on the way, it’s a sign for most of us to stock up on groceries and plan to stay inside. Those who make their living from the removal of that snow, however, make sure they are ready to go 24 hours before it even touches the ground.

While the average citizen merely needs to know where the shovel is and if the snowblower has gas, the business and logistics of snow removal can be quite complex. In addition, unpredictable climate conditions year to year make it difficult to accurately forecast the demand for services each season.

But, at the end of the day, residential and commercial property owners alike need the snow gone. To accomplish that, central Iowans have a multitude of options from small teams to large companies, from seasonal contracts to hourly rates, from 2-inch triggers to zero tolerance, and from salt to no salt, among other options.

These celebrities were born on this date: Mariska Hargitay, Tiffani Thiessen, Norah O'Donnell, Chesley Sullenberger, Richard Dean Anderson, Anita Baker

SUBMIT: Send your birthday greetings and congratulatory notes to: tammy@iowalivingmagazines.com

The answer to yesterday's riddle:

What should you give the teller at a virtual bank? A REALITY CHECK! - Gail Tomlinson. Also sending answers: William Snyder, Rex Post.

Today's riddle

What do you call it when green onions sing Bee Gees tunes?

Have a guess? Email tammy@iowalivingmagazines.com

To advertise in this daily newsletter, contact Jolene Goodman at jolene@iowalivingmagazines.com, or call 515-953-4822 ext. 319.

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